


zero degrees celsius

by Powdear



Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, It's not that serious tho, M/M, Suicidal Thoughts, to be updated - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:47:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24780292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Powdear/pseuds/Powdear
Summary: Kevin represented darkness and cold while Jacob was the heart of spring.
Relationships: Bae Joonyoung | Jacob/Moon Hyungseo | Kevin
Comments: 3
Kudos: 27





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hi! i've not written chaptered fics for a while but since i have this sort of a soulmate fic idea i decided to start again.  
> long story short; you get your own playing card that represents you. whatever the card is, that's what you're supposed to be like..i suck at explanations but i hope u like the beginning

These days Kevin's heart was as cold as winter air. 

To make it better, he tried to ignore his own shadow, if there was no shadow, then there was nothing to make one. Then he didn't exist. He hated looking at himself in the mirror. He hated seeing his shadow on the street at night. His life had become an endless winter.

All of this because it was supposed to be that way. He was the King of Spades, he was supposed to be as cold as ice. He hated every second of it. How was he going to be loved if he was this cold? His mother had been telling him poetic stories about her and his father all these years. But none of them was cold. His mother was spring, she was light, love. The Queen of Hearts. And his father was as warm as her. The King of Diamonds.

And Kevin? There was supposed to be nothing bright about him. His power was darkness. Regardless of how bright he was as a child. He loved being easy-going, joking around, being himself. Darkness was not who he was. Even if his birth card wanted to tell him so. Once he presented, many things changed. Once he turned 19 a few months ago, he lived with his coldness even in spring.

He wished for it to end every single day.

  
  


//

Jacob.

Jacob was warm. His smile made flowers bloom and spring come early. His voice airy and pleasant to the ear, lovelier than a thousand blooming trees.

Jacob was spring itself, light, love. He was the King of Hearts. The one that made you smile, warmed you up.

Once he presented, everyone was ecstatic. Himself included. He smiled shyly and moved on with his day.

Nothing really changed. Besides his wish to find his soulmate and be loved. He wanted it more than ever now.

There was rain in spring as much as there was sun, and today was one of those days. The sky was dark grey, pouring it's tears over the city.

Rainy days made Jacob sad but it was still in a way beautiful to him nonetheless.

//

It was raining.

Kevin was looking out his window, up the sky, down the pavement. It was beautiful. It smelled dreamy. It made him sad. Why would the rain make him sad. It made no sense. He used to love it when it was raining. Now it just reminded him of his nostalgia over warmth.

He wondered. _Would going out and getting soaked in it make me even colder?_

_Would I freeze to death? Or will the rain just turn its eye away from me as well, just like I have from myself?_

He decided to find out, grabbed his sneakers from the shoe rack, put them on, and walked out. Into and down the hall, down the stairs. One front door and he could test his theory.

He was looking at the ground instead of forward nowadays, instead of looking at the sky, so naturally, when someone opened the door he didn't notice until he collided with said someone, almost taking his own eye out with the person's umbrella tips.

"Oh my god," All the water from the person's umbrella definitely got on him as well. "Are you okay? I'm so sorry, I wasn't looking where I'm going."

_He._ He wasn't looking. Kevin didn't even hear the door open, he was in a daze as most days nowadays.

He sounded worried. It wasn't his fault for Kevin's negligence. He was about to just tell him that so he looked up, finally.

"Oh," Kevin didn't recognized him. "You're the new neighbor?" He had a strange look on his face. Kevin suddenly did not care if he was hurt or not. He didn't feel like he was. Just a little wet from raindrops. He was going to live.

Kevin hadn't actually seen him before. He assumed as much simply because he had heard another family was moving in from his mother.

"I am," He said in a hurry. "But your eye,"

Why was this stranger suddenly so worried about Kevin? What was wrong with his eye, he was okay, wasn't he.

"Your eye," He repeated. "I think it got scratched by the umbrella tips."

_Oh._

"It doesn't look too bad?" Kevin asked instead, hoping for the conversation to die down. As much as he was enjoying looking at a new face. Quite..beautiful new face but his mission to go out seemed more important to him at the moment.

"No blood," The stranger smiled. Kevin felt weird. _Weirdly warm._ "You do have half a finger long red line reaching your temple though."

"Ah," _That was okay._ "I'll be off, thanks."

And Kevin went past him. _Fast._ He opened and closed the door before the other had a chance to somehow stop him.

It's not like he had a reason to though. Kevin was just a stranger to him.

"You don't…" Jacob started after the other had run off, finishing softly. "have an umbrella though."

  
  


Running out made Kevin realize he didn't even put a jacket on. He just walked in his hoodie, his teeth already chattering. It was not a priority. He wanted to freeze, didn't he? It was just a stupid thought. One that didn't have a place invading his mind right now.

_A little further._ To the park. He wanted to walk to the park, sit on a bench and look at the sky this time.

Raindrops were running down his glasses enough to make him almost not see where he was going. _Right._ His sight sucked. Just like many other things now. He wondered how bumping into his new neighbor didn't knock off his glasses but only resulted in a scratch. Some things didn't need much further thought, he decided, as he walked through the park's entrance.

It was quiet, sans the noise the downpour was making and his own breathing. He sighed.

There it was, a rain soaked bench just for him. His sneakers were leaving slight imprints in the ground, it wasn't muddy enough to get it much over his shoe soles but it could be slippery if he wasn't careful enough. He was careful.

Kevin's mission was accomplished once he sat down, the rain water soaking his pants through.

He was so cold. Now physically as well. At least it matched how it felt inside.

Kevin hugged himself nonetheless. He wrapped his own arms around his torso and shivered, looking, or at least trying to look up at the sky past the pouring rain.

What was it that he was trying to prove to himself again? He was going to catch a cold. Worry his family and have them take care of him. His emotions clouded his judgement.

_He was so cold. It was crazy. He better get moving._ And he would. In a minute. Or two. Soon. He didn't think it'd fit to have rain as the cause of his death.

So he stood up. His legs almost betraying him, he was fully shivering now, shaking even but ignored it in favor of trying to walk back as fast as he could without slipping.

/

Today, Jacob was glad that his window faced the front of the building because ever since his neighbor had ran out past him in the rain, he was checking outside, hoping to see him get back. He looked upset, Jacob noted. He hoped he was okay.

Jacob's parents had gone out for dinner, so he was all alone until at least midnight. He was glad for that, being alone at home sometimes made him feel more at ease. He needed it, so it was rather nice.

Jacob more looked outside than doing anything else for the past half an hour but he couldn't help it. He worried, wondering if that was too strange. To worry over someone you just met. His neighbor wasn't anyone important. Yet. He didn't even know him, so how could he be?

Instead of trying to find an answer to his own questions, he kept looking.

Thirty five minutes. Thirty seven minutes. Thirty nine minutes.

_Forty minutes. Forty one-_

Jacob noticed a small figure fast walking towards the entrance and his heart skipped a beat. He ran to his door but stopped before he actually opened it.

How _the hell_ was he going to explain himself exactly? He didn't even know the name of his neighbor. Instincts be damned. He wanted to run out at this very moment but what was he going to do when he did? No, _no._

The door creaked open.

His neighbor had any and all right to ignore him if he wanted to. Jacob was going down a warrior.

He didn't actually run but just stood there. Infront of his door. His neighbor's was a little more down the hall, he had to go past Jacob's.

So when he heard the sound of footsteps nearing him, he just stood where he was. His neighbor was walking slower now, looking at his feet rather than anywhere else so if he didn't see Jacob at all, he couldn't blame him.

Kevin hoped to avoid confrontation when he went past the threshold. He hoped his parents were in the kitchen or something, with no imediate view to the front door so he had time to rush to the bathroom and take care of his soaking clothes, take a _warm_ shower and hope not to get sick.

He was looking at the ground but spotted a pair of socked feet to his right, he looked up.

_It was him. The neighbor._

Jacob stood unmoving, looking back at Kevin for a while before breaking the silence. "Are you...okay?"

Kevin knew he was hesitating to ask such a thing, considering Kevin probably looked a shit ton of not okay. He applauded his bravery nonetheless and decided to settle with, 

"My name's Kevin." Before continuing down the hall.

Jacob was awestruck. Kevin's jet black hair was soaking wet, dripping, or was all the water coming from his clothes? He didn't know but Kevin still looked breathtaking to him. As strange as this could be. Breathtaking and definitely hurting. But not physically.

Jacob stopped his own thoughts in order to say, "I'm Jacob." Just before Kevin walked inside his family's apartment.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> filler

_My name's Jacob._

Kevin prepared for what was or was not to come once he stepped foot at home. He was scared his parents would yell at him and maybe it was going to make him cry, _maybe_ _and then how do you cover that up?_ That's not what he needed. If they yelled he wanted to brush it off, get changed and pretend like he didn't go out on purpose. Act as if it was all alright and dark thoughts weren't invading his mind as often as they did. Smile at them and be sincere.

Maybe it was too selfish of him to wish for that.

Maybe there were too many maybe's.

He opened the door and first thing he saw was his mother standing in the hallway, as if she was waiting for him to get back. He looked down, his heart was going to jump out of his chest. This is not what he expected to see. He didn't even want to read her. Didn't look long enough to see if she was mad, disappointed, _worried?_ Perhaps.

His eyes studied the ground as if it was the most interesting subject in the world as they always did these days. 

He saw his mother walk closer to him, not saying anything, not even a sigh. Was she perhaps going to hit him? Just get it over with? Did he even have a right to think this? When has his mother ever-

Kevin felt his mother's arms wrap around him and now he wanted to cry even harder. She was so warm.

"You're freezing," And Kevin didn't want to hear the worry in her voice. Didn't want to be the cause of it. He didn't want to make her sad. Why was she sad?

He was soaked but she hugged him tigher, making him return it by wrapping his arms around her too, silently holding tighter than he ever has.

"I'm okay. Really." Lying wasn't in Kevin's best abilities but he tried it anyway. How bad could he stray from being okay? He was alive. Still. He was probably going to be alive for a long time, hopefully. _Surely._

"Kevin," His mother pulled away a little in order to have him look at her, and he did. He looked in her eyes and could see all her love. All her warmth. His mother did love him. 

"Me and your father wanted to get to know the new neighbors so we invited them for dinner this Friday, I was going to tell you earlier" She squeezed his hand. "But I didn't have the chance."

_Oh._

"What am I even saying" She sighed, not knowing how to approach her own son. She didn't have a way with him as she wished to even if they were close. And still. She didn't want Kevin to feel alone. Ever.

"I was worried even if you weren't gone for that long, I'm glad you came back. Let's just talk next time you don't feel okay, or if you don't want to talk me, talk to your father, or a friend. I have never experienced what you are and I can't judge your feelings, but I'll try to be here and understand you. Okay, sweetheart?"

_God._ Kevin has never tried to fight his tears from spilling harder than he was doing right now. He sniffed, feeling way somber than he was a while ago. So he just settled with "Okay" and moved on.

  
  


Once he entered the bathroom it was another story. He turned on the hot water and let it run down his body, the bathroom filled with steam and he couldn't see himself in the mirror beside him anymore.

It was hopeless.

His tears spilled hotter than the scalding water. 

He felt sorry. To his mother and father, to anyone that met him ever since he presented.

To Jacob. He didn't even know him, why did he feel like he did him wrong if they only spoke for a few minutes? Kevin had no idea.

But he wanted to see him more and talk to him more, even though he felt like he was somehow going to grow a big angry grey cloud over the other's happy aura.

That was impossible, right? Kevin didn't have such a power. He hoped. He didn't want to make anyone miserable but somehow what he wanted, he almost never seemed to get.

  
  


//

_Kevin._

Right. Jacob was going to properly meet Kevin on Friday. He didn't know how else to feel besides like he couldn't wait for the day to come. He wanted to get to know the other even if their first meeting was quite...dramatic. Kind of not what anyone would expect. But that didn't really matter to him because he wanted to see Kevin again. He couldn't really explain why. What was so special about the other… He collided with him and then ran away.

Jacob wondered faintly, why did he shiver when he was close to Kevin earlier. Maybe it was the cold but he was inside still, wearing layers that had him feel warm even outside. It was a very subtle feeling, gone as soon as Kevin went away but memorable enough for him to think of again.

Friday was close.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, I appreciate it ~,~ comments? i love that too, feel free if u wanna say something, updates will be irregular


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